R.eminiscence

i feel so...superfluous.
like hello?
i dont get adults,seriously.
i dont get friends.
whats with the attitude?
is it a new trend?
i dont know.

you shout at me.
you thought that im not hurt at all,do you?
i was,very deep.
i dislike being shouted at.
you dont even know whats happening at home.
yet,you cog up a nice attitude & made it seem like its all my fault.
i felt indignant.
you didnt even care at all.
& you,you always give the wtf tone.
i dont think you even know how i felt.
you're so acrimonious.
my house isnt so amorous as you think it is.
the world seems so iniquitous,
degrading themselves further into the hollow darkened pitch.
humans are so unscrupulous.
the communications between us feels like a taciturn,
so recitant.
i was appalled at your attitude,at your unsightly face.
i seriously dislike you.

i am dumbfounded at how adults think.

they always think that,

the younger ones are always correct.

ive always wondered,
if i was getting married,
will my father come & walk me down the aisle?
or even be proud or the achievements i made?
or just even say "i love you" sincerely?
maybe not.
he has been gone.
there's no way i can even see him,
not even in court,since they dont allow me to enter.

if money can buy my father back,

or get my family together again,

or just solve the messy puzzle-d life of mine,

i would even die for it to happen.

at least,to even see my father before i leave.

Dear Blog,

you know how i felt each time a problem crops up?
i feel inutile.
i feel like an idiot.
why.
cause i cant solve it.
& everytime my heart cries,i try my best not to show it out.
but humans take it for advantage.
they thought,that im happy.
insults,swearings,many absurd words just fly out.
i keep quiet.
bullies,scoldings,i take it to heart.
heart knows best.
emotionally hurt,physically normal,mentally retarded.
thats me.
so many problems to solve,so many blames accepted that isnt even mine.
yet,when i wanted to rant everything out,
no one's there.
no one understands.
& all im left with is just...
ME.
in the corner,talking to my carebear,
as though it understands.
as though it would reply,
even though i thought it would,
it didnt.
i realized i was in a mess.
everything of me.
& all i can do now is,
to sit & wait for reaper to come.

~end~

Dear Diary,

N's has ended.
more problems are created.
i do not know what's wrong with the adults.
like seriously?
there's this bitch who thinks she really owns me?
but in fact,she doesnt.
she wasnt there since i was a baby.
& now,she wants me to acknowledge her as my mother.
oh boy,
i should've known.
life was so tough,even withoout a fatherly figure to encourage me.
it was so melancholic,
such a pathetic,lamentable life.
it was worse than "sucks".
i've always pensively thought about it,but nothing senseful came up.
she has always thought of me as obnoxious.
she was such an abhorrence.
i friggin' dislike you.

~end~

C.laudia♥

" She’s a lil girl,
living in her perfect world
Until the bad guy come,
and tore everything apart.."

Money cant buy everything
Not all endings are happy
everything's just like alice in her lalaland.

Claudia.
was on earth for 16 annoying years.
since 220794.
Friends take priorities.
i ♥ green & panda.

` Green Crumpler bag
` Pass chinese
` Better videoing skills
` Panda stuff toys
` A new green badminton racquet
` Have a stronger voice
` Finish learning guitar
` New handphone
~~` Promote to sec5NA/Higher Nitec~~
` Looney Tunes stuff toy

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